Digging for gold

I have had a strange sensation this past week.  It began when I was listening to the album "Watermark".  This was something I used to listen to all the time about 20 years ago. 
Coupled to the music was the memory of a work experience placement I had when I was 16 at Canterbury Archaeological Trust.  It was a two week placement and I remember it quite vaguely apart from the smell of the finds room and the sensation of working, under a baking July sun, brushing away at ancient pieces of pottery embedded in the earth.

This new world I am living in is a place of discovery, like the dig.  For a long time I wore certain roles like garments.  The role of "wife" was one of them.  Now that that role is set aside I find myself uncovering the person I used to be.  It is a slow process and it is sensory stuff which helps with the brushing away of all the dirt.  There are moments when the brushing gets kind of painful and I want to heap all the dirt back over myself and hide.  But it's exciting (in a reserved, British way). 

I like the feel of the idea of discovering that person, before she got all hidden by roles and expectations.  I like the feel of how careful you have to be as you uncover something precious hidden in the earth, how gently you have to work, how it takes time and patience.